Friday, April 18, 2008

My Internet Kazillionaire Business

When you click through to MIB at ---


--- you are directed to a website landing page with two immediate conflicting messages and two alternative directions to head within its system.

The conflict is in the mixed messages between the first announcement, in quotation marks, to greet the visitor, which reads ---

"It's Official . . . MyInternetBusiness.com Is Now Launched!"

--- and this unquoted sentence that follows ---

Corporate Site Is Now Under Construction

Now, to my way of thinking, which may be way off, but way off what I'll never know, these two pieces of information juxtaposed like this just send thrills of delight up into the polar tunnel of my mental tuning fork, and a cacophony of going, "Huh?" begins its reverberations twixt my eardrums. Each sentence comes in a calming darkly green font hue.

Next to greet the intrepid adventurer in that which constitutes this online soup of eager beavers chasing the proverbial buck are the two choices of either signing up and becoming a sure-fired licit participant in all that MIB is, or simply logging into one's MIB account.

And then there are the usual suspects of the customer support ilk. Actually there is just one of these subjects, although the same URL is presented three times. Heck, whadoncha jist go check 'er out fer yerself there pardner . . . at


But anyway, the gist (not the "jist", that was just in jest) is me wondering how something can be officially launched and still under construction at the same time. I mean, I'm no engineer, except perhaps in how I engineer my own messages and missives and meanings, but I don't think that I would do that to, for example, a bridge. Maybe a very small and insignificant bridge, like for fire ants trying to get into my house or something. I mean, is this even considered, dare I say it (Shock'n'awe!!!
Shock'n'awe!!! Shock'n'awe!!!) --- PERFESHUNNEL? Ye gads, I might be onto something here. I will bear down and give it some duly processed thought.

So anyway, though, that's what's on the entry point into the back office regions of My Internet Business.

Teach a man how to get a fishing pole . . .

And, if necessary, teach a man what fish are about. ("Well, fish are about water. This means at least two things. One of these things might be that fish have this intense relationship with water. Another could very well be the notion of fish frolicking about in water, as in they hang out there, them fishies be all about in the water all the time.")

But I don't know if you actually have to show the man how to fish. He can figure that out by himself if he has a fishing pole, he knows what fish look and hopefully taste like and can find a body of water containing fish for catching with his brand new pole.

Next time we go inside. No state secrets, sorry, skeletal scaling only, interfacial framework. Stay in touch.

No comments: